Saturday, October 06, 2007  1:22 PM
s t r e s s
You hate it, you dread the days when it's here, but when it is one and a half weeks late, you start to get worried and wish it would arrive already. A typical love-hate relationship.
That's just one of my stress symptoms, as I'd like to believe it to be, and not the beginning of some more serious... implications.
I haven't been able to sleep. Hardly, or not at all. And when I sink into that fifteen minutes of sleep, I dream I'm in an aircrash and I can feel the plane going down and the churning continues in my stomach as I wake up in cold sweat. Either that, or I take two hours to get to sleep. I go to bed at 1am, and the minute my head hits the pillow, my mind works twice as fast. The next thing I know, I check my clock and it's 3am, and I haven't slept at all. Then I start to berate myself because I know I'm going to be a sleepy and moody person the next morning.
I need a patter, those that pat you to sleep every night, like how my grandma or mom would when I couldn't sleep as a child. Or someone to sing, or some aromatheraphy. Or a giant sleeping pill.
Ironically, I manage to doze off right in front of Irene's watchful eye during feature writing. I stare at her with the "concentrated" look, while my mind is slowly falling asleep. Before I know what's happening, I jerk myself awake and she's still looking at me. Sigh. As Weix puts it, boredom reaches new heights in her class.
I do the most random things when I'm stressed. I go swimming, and I swim laps. I remember the days when swimming used to be stress. I would use every excuse in the 'Lie-To-Your-Father-To-Get-Out-Of-Swimming-Lessons' - headaches, stomachaches, fevers, homework - just to get out of those Sunday swimming classes.
I crossed the road when the red man was glaring at me. Only I didn't see the red man. I walked across the road, mind preoccupied as usual, and almost got knocked over. I turned my head in time to see a car horn, tyres screech and the car stopping right at my feet. I scurried off before the driver could curse profanities at me.
My wisdom tooth is killing me, again. And the pain is spreading to other parts of my mouth, resulting in a nagging sore throat. But the thought of getting it removed - that horrifying dental experience at Kowloon City - makes me wonder if I should just bear with the pain and wait for it to go away.
Coupled with headaches, fever spells and a sudden memory loss on the last time I've eaten because I never feel hungry these days, I need it to come already.
Just to reassure me that there still is some normalcy in my body system.
2 comment(s). Your thoughts?
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