Sunday, September 14, 2008  11:09 PM
Bubbles and sparklers
"When the natural power of vision is devoted to the Holy Spirit, it becomes the power of perceiving God's will and the whole life is kept in simplicity." - Oswald Chambers
Simplicity is the secret of seeing things clearly. That's what I often tell myself, and I need reminders of that fact. What would it be like if I were simple enough not to think that I need to be simple? That paradoxical issue has been on my mind for a long time, but over the years, it grows to be my desire more and more, although it also becomes harder the more I'm exposed. My role models are the simplest women I know, with their effervescent joy, smiley faces, pure hearts and being real in every single situation. This weekend has been a happy one, with many many reminders on being simple, from Uncle roland's message in church to singing "Purify my heart" to my devotional today. I spent Saturday evening under the bright lights at Bedok, with a group of people I never thought I'd be spending that day with - soaking in the sweetness of stage noises, unpretentious crowds and the balmy sky. We bought sparklers and bubbles, pickup sticks and oldschool guinness stout glasses and let one-dollar raspberry ripple and durian ice-cream dribble all over mouths. I blew bubbles at a gurgling baby and watched as she tried to burst them with her tiny fingers. Then we sat under a void deck and talked for hours about next week, next year and the future. I came home smiling, feeling like I just ate a whole roll of strawberry tape gum, and wanting more nights like that one.
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Monday, September 08, 2008 1:14 AM
Did you?
Do you remember the exact moment when your father first let go of your hand as you stepped onto the escalator, that frightening moving staircase? Or when someone secretly took off the training wheels of your tasselled pink bicycle?
I think I remember them, in the recesses of my memory, although I can't quite pinpoint whether it was reality or part of my imagination that works harder than reality. I'm unabashedly a dreamer, and I've always been. I space out more often than I should, and I've mastered the art of still looking like I'm paying attention to you through training during amath lessons.
I watched as the little boy in the crisp shirt let go of his father's hand, and grinned broadly as he skipped off the escalator while the proud parent watched on.
These days, I like being independent. I crave freedom, and doing exactly what I want at certain moments. And He fills me with such joy that I know the eternal comfort of being watched over and loved, and physical solitude means nothing to me any longer. I went to Baybeats alone, something I would never have done a few years ago, but claimed that decision as one of the best I made this year. Observing the people around me, the eclecticism of it all, the beats droning on in the background, the lead singer of Lucksmiths declaring that everyone should get married that night and the magnificent lights of the skyline before me, there's no feeling like it. It was an innate sense of peace, and happiness that I wouldn't have experienced had I been with another.
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Thursday, September 04, 2008 2:58 AM
Sunday Dawn
South Africa, the next destination for one of the five for the next three months, and off she went last week accompanied by another, a true GG affair. It's been a week, but already it feels like a month that she's gone. My days are slower and freer because of her absence. I've seen pictures, cheetahs and ostrich rides and lions galore - very Animal Planet and perfect for Bev's loud free spirit. Last I heard, she set off the panic alarm on the plane, much to the mortification of Sharon. We'll miss those moments back home.
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