Wednesday, March 18, 2009  1:49 AM
Spotlight on spring brights
Tonight I'm really missing you, and you.
My eclectic, weirdly strange world, mismatched for all I cared, but it fit once upon a time. What about the present? A piece in the puzzle that I can't find reason for, I need to cut those strings that tie me back faster, quicker. Still, I'd wear you again.
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Saturday, March 07, 2009 2:56 AM
Find an escape just running away
I haven't written here in a long while, and I've noticed a trend. I stop writing when I feel like life doesn't leave me with space to think, when I'm caught up in the hula hoops of events and the tangle of happenings around me. It's just been touch and go lately, I don't feel particularly connected to anything or anyone; I'm neither happy nor sad, and I don't have an urge to do anything at all.
The last time I felt motivated to do something was the valentine's day event with the children. That day was one which I'd not have traded for anything, and the planning and stressing over it culminated in a picturesque day with the sun shining full down on happy children's faces.
Fyp is my current life. I've pushed all other emotions aside for this project that sometimes makes me feel like I love journalism and telling the other people's stories as a service to others, yet at times I feel like I'm flailing not knowing whether I'm writing the right thing. I have no clue what's going on in any of my other modules and I'm especially lost in modernist literature.
I'm very tired, and I miss spending time thinking about the more important issues in life, the ones I know that are going to matter in the long run. The ones I occupy my mind with during the holidays, when life seems a little easier to tread on. I wonder how good stagnant emotions are, but I'm afraid they've already gotten attuned to that jaded part of me, that part that pushes more and more things into the space in my heart which I tell myself I don't care for any longer.
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